November 19, 2009
 

Fr. Carter had a dream.

Life in the Spirit

Fr. Carter says:

    St. Paul tells us, "We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit that is from God, so that we may understand the things freely given us by God" (1 Cor 2:12). This particular text admirably serves the discussion of mysticism. Mysticism is the lived awareness, to a highly developed degree, of what it means to live the God-life. It is a profound realization of what it means to participate in God's life through grace. The above text reminds us that the Holy Spirit has been given to us to teach us how to live this God-life, this Christ-life. The Spirit perfectly understands the life of God, and he perfectly understands our participation in that life. He is the perfect teacher who instructs us how to live and develop this life, ideally to its mystical heights.

    The Holy Spirit, consequently, is with us to guide us in our life in Christ. He continually desires to deepen the Christic, Trinitarian image within us. While by no means pretending to be exhaustive, let us consider some of the truths and practices pertinent to life in the Spirit.

    The Spirit desires that we constantly seek out Jesus. Whatever the Spirit wants to tell us, along whatever path he desires to lead us—all this in some way is contained in the mystery of Christ.  To be formed in Christ under the gentle but sure touch of the Spirit means that we must be open to the spiritual lessons contained in the various mysteries or events of Christ's life. This is especially true of the two central and summary mysteries, Christ's death and resurrection. We must consistently strive to have the proper perspective concerning these two key events. Spiritual writing has not always presented such a perspective. For many years a considerable portion of spiritual writing and teaching seemed to present the cross dimension, or dying with Christ, as if it were to receive almost exclusive attention. That we should be living resurrection upon this earth, as well as looking forward to its culmination in eternal life, was often not properly emphasized. To live resurrection in the here and now means to increasingly partake of resurrection peace, joy, happiness and fulfillment. Our incorporation into Christ's passion and death is a means to a life of resurrection here on earth as well as in eternity.

    Today, we must guard against the opposite danger—incorrectly emphasizing resurrection with the consequent effect of removing the cross aspect from its proper place in Christian consciousness. We must always be aware of the words of Paul: "For Christ did not send me to baptize but to preach the gospel, and not with the wisdom of human eloquence, so that the cross of Christ might not be emptied of its meaning" (1 Cor 1:17).

    The Spirit, then, desires to lead us to a consistent and balanced contact with Christ. Some of the means we should use to assure this contact are participation in liturgy, reading of Scripture, and prayer.

    The mention of prayer easily leads us to another important aspect of life in the Spirit—how the Spirit guides us in making the proper decisions in the following of Christ. Among the various purposes of prayer is seeking such guidance from the Spirit. In prayer the Christian asks for the necessary light to make decisions according to the teaching and example of Jesus. In prayer one asks for the grace to see persons, places, things, circumstances, according to a Christian perspective. Prayer, then, is necessary for proper decision-making because it is a special source of light for the intellect. Prayer is also a special source of strength for the will. Prayer gives us the strength and courage to make correct decisions even though these at times are very difficult or unpopular ones, ones which may make life unusually demanding for a period of time.   

    As we seek the light of the Spirit during prayer, we must be aware that not everything we originally think is an illumination of the Spirit actually is such. In other words, there are false lights or illuminations. We must, therefore, be able to distinguish between true and false lights. As St. Ignatius of Loyola tells us, we must consider the entire course of what we think are the enlightenments of the Spirit.¹ We must consider their beginning, middle, and end. If the entire course is good and directed to what is right, then we have assurance our lights are according to the Spirit. A false light could begin by presenting us with a good, but the end point, and possibly also the middle point, discloses the false light in its true character. Such a light would lead us to what is evil, or less good.

    As we prayerfully consider the various options involved in a decision-making process, we begin to experience a sense of peace and clarity relative to one of the options. This usually seems to happen in a more gradual manner, but it also can occur rather suddenly. This experience of peace and clarity is one of the great signs pointing to the decision which the Spirit desires we make.

    Just as we can be subjected to false lights, we can also experience false peace. For example, we can experience a certain peace because the decision we are about to make will relieve us of a considerable burden. The peace, however, is short-lived. We begin to feel dissatisfied with the prospective decision, ill-at-ease about actually choosing this particular action. Recognizing the briefly experienced peace as a false sign, we then continue the discernment process.

    We must also realize that the experience of true peace in in the decision-making process does not guarantee that all anxiety is removed. In choosing a certain option, we are indeed guided by the experience of peace, but there can also be certain fears attached to our choice. There can also be aspects of the decision not to our liking. The experience of peace, however, remains dominant, giving us reasonable assurance we have chosen correctly in the Spirit.       

    In striving to make decisions in the Spirit, we must also be aware of another important principle: as far as possible, we should never make decisions, especially important ones, when we are in a state of desolation. In such a state we are in danger of making decisions which are not in accordance with the Spirit. Let us consider some of the words of St. Ignatius concerning desolation: "I call desolation ... darkness of soul, turmoil of spirit, inclination to what is low and earthly, restlessness rising from many disturbances and temptations which lead to want of faith, want of hope, want of love ...."²

    As we progress in our discussion of principles and practices regarding life in the Spirit, let us now consider the concept of spiritual freedom. Growth in this freedom is one of the great signs of spiritual progress. Spiritual freedom is the ability to relate to persons, places, things, circumstances, and all else according to God's will. It means we are free enough to live in the manner God desires. Spiritual freedom means we are not wrongfully attached to this or that—an attachment which prevents us from following the lead of the Spirit.

    As we are using the idea of spiritual freedom, a lack of such does not imply a person is not responsible for wrongful action. It simply means one abuses freedom, that one is here and now attached to a particular attitude or desire which leads one to go against the Spirit's lead.

    St. Ignatius of Loyola and St. John of the Cross are two of the great masters regarding growth in spiritual freedom. They do not use the same type of language, but their message is basically the same—one must take whatever means are necessary to put oneself at the disposal of God. One must labor at breaking the inordinate attachments which lead one to go against God's will. One must develop the spiritual freedom necessary to decide according to the Spirit's guidance.

    The more the mystical process develops, the more this spiritual freedom takes deeper root in a person. Growth in mysticism includes a growing desire to be possessed by God, to do whatever he wants, to accomplish his will at all costs. All this describes a person who is truly free, a person who uses freedom to accomplish one's God-given destiny.   

    Growth in spiritual freedom is accompanied by growth in spiritual peace. Here, then, we wish to expand upon this concept of peace which we earlier discussed in connection with prayer and its decision-making process. For we should cultivate spiritual peace not only relative to discernment, but also as it pertains to all aspects of our lives.

    To maintain oneself in a state of peace is extremely important for life in the Spirit. We can best listen to the Spirit and respond to his lights when in a basic peace of spirit. We may speak of three different kinds of this peace.

    The first type is not of everyday occurrence. It is that feeling of peace which permeates all aspects of our being to such an extent that we can, as it were, almost taste the peace. We seem to feel it flowing through the total person. Again, this experience is not the ordinary fare.

    A second type of peace is one which is our more customary companion on the spiritual journey. It is of a calmer nature, sometimes even accompanied by considerable spiritual dryness. It is that kind of peace which we experience on a rather daily basis. It is present amid the ordinary successes, troubles, joys, and anxieties of everyday existence. If it does not raise us to the ecstatic level of the first kind of peace, it is, nevertheless, a welcome companion. It enables us to go about our life in the Lord with a basic joy, enthusiasm, trust, and optimism.   

    The third kind of peace is, as is the case with the type first described, of a more rare occurrence. It is that peace which we should strive for even though we are presently experiencing very significant—perhaps even severe—suffering of one kind or other. This mode of suffering has the capacity to disturb us mightily, to confuse us, to narrow our perspective. We must, then, make very special efforts to go deep down to the center of our being where there is that peace which even deep suffering cannot remove. When we reach this centerpoint, when we actuate this deep-rooted level of peace, we are in a position to confront the suffering as the Spirit desires. We are in a position to allow him to guide us through the suffering in a manner which promotes the pattern of death-resurrection. We rise from the experience more spiritually mature, persons capable of deeper love of God and neighbor.

    As we progress to other attitudes necessary for life according to the Spirit, it is of great importance that we mention love of neighbor. A dynamic awareness and loving concern for our neighbor is an extremely important sign that we are truly alive in the Spirit. This seems so theoretically obvious to us, but in the day-in and day-out existence of even committed Christians this criterion does not always receive the attention it should. In his first epistle, St. Johnappeals to love of neighbor as a special sign of our walking in the Spirit: "Whoever says he is in the light, yet hates his brother, is still in the darkness. Whoever loves his brother remains in the light, and there is nothing in him to cause a fall" (1 Jn 2:9-10). Another passage: "Beloved, if God so loved us, we also must love one another. No one has ever seen God. Yet, if we love another, God remains in us, and his love is brought to perfection in us" (1 Jn 4:11-12).

    Flexibility of will is another indication we are properly listening to the Spirit. To determine rigidly to adhere to certain courses of action no matter what is contradictory to the concept of being open to the Spirit. A word of caution, however, is necessary here. This flexibility of spirit does not mean instability. There is a basic stability necessary in the following of Christ. This stability is itself a sign we are corresponding to the Spirit's guidance.³  Flexibility of spirit does not mean departing from our basic way of life in Christ. The flexibility we are describing is rather an aspect of openness to the Spirit's guidance. This flexibility is a disposition which excludes a preconceived pattern of life in Christ which is hostile to the legitimate changes, modifications, and adaptations which one is called to make at certain junctures of the spiritual journey.

    In discussing our life in the Spirit, we should say a few words concerning spiritual direction. The term itself basically gives its own definition. Spiritual guidance helps us lead our spiritual life—life according to the Spirit.

    The role of spiritual guidance is rooted in the communal aspect of Christian existence. We do not go to God alone. In so many different ways, we are meant to help others achieve their destiny. In turn, we are meant to receive assistance from our brothers and sisters in the human family. Receiving spiritual guidance is one implementation of this social dimension of the Christian life.

    There are numerous ways we receive guidance in our Christian existence. Receiving instruction through homilies and retreat conferences, attending seminars, workshops, and lectures on various aspects of the spiritual life, pertinent and sound advice received from a friend or marriage partner—these are some of the ways in which guidance comes our way.

    There exists, consequently, this more general mode of spiritual direction. However, we can also greatly profit from the more individualized mode. According to this framework, one chooses a spiritual guide with whom one meets on a more or less regular basis. The frequency depends on various factors. Beginners in the spiritual life usually require more frequent meetings until they become solidly grounded in fundamentals. Times of particular trial offer another occasion for more frequent sessions with a guide, as do times of critical decision-making.

    The fundamental task of the spiritual guide is to help one discern the action of the Spirit. To achieve this, the guide must be a good and patient listener. As one commentator says, "A lot of people expect us to question them, but it is important to accustom them not to count on our questions, but to talk on their own accord. It is only after we have listened to them for a long time like this that we shall be able to ask the essential question."⁴ 

    Listening is of such importance because it allows the guide to see how the Spirit seems to be leading this particular person. Knowing this, the guide can, asking the proper questions and making pertinent comments,
intelligently make his or her contributions in aiding the person's ongoing openness to the Spirit. The guide, consequently, is not out front, as it were, leading the person according to a preconceived path of how he or she is to follow the Spirit. Of course, there are certain fundamentals of the spiritual life which are the same for all, and a good guide will operate according to these. Since each person is unique, however, the Spirit leads each according to a pattern which will in various ways differ from that of others.

    It is obvious, then, that a person should choose a guide with whom one feels comfortable and with whom one is willing to share the basic essentials of one's interior life. Unless the guide knows these, he or she cannot properly aid the person in following the lead of the Spirit.

    Besides being a good listener, a guide should possess other basic qualities. One should obviously possess requisite knowledge of the spiritual life. Requisite knowledge is a relative concept. For example, the knowledge required to direct a beginner in the spiritual life is obviously less than that required to direct one who has entered the mystical state. A good guide should also possess considerable prudence—to know how and when to apply spiritual principles to particular individuals. Knowing how to point out errant ways is also of obvious importance. To possess not only a theoretical knowledge of the spiritual life, but also that knowledge gained through one's own living of the ways of the Spirit is a desired characteristic. These, then, are some of the qualities a good spiritual guide should possess.

    As we near the end of our considerations regarding life in the Spirit, it is most appropriate that we make mention of Mary. Just as Mary cooperated with the Holy Spirit in bringing Jesus into this world, so is her cooperation with the Spirit present regarding each of us. Under the Spirit she desires to bring us to a maturity in Christ. Her concern, her care, her love for us is beyond our full comprehension. Under her maternal protection, we go to the Father with Christ and by the Spirit. Truly she is our spiritual mother: "Standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother and his mother's sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary of Magdala. When Jesus saw his mother and the disciple there whom he loved, he said to his mother, 'Woman, behold, your son.' Then he said to the disciple, 'Behold, your mother,'" (Jn 19: 25-27).

    As we surrender more and more to the Spirit and Mary and become increasingly formed in the image of Christ, our lives become more mystical. We grow in the awareness that truly to live is to live the God-life in Christ. Increasingly we live by God's love, by his wisdom, by his strength. Our awareness, and indeed, our entire persons become increasingly transformed in God. An aspect of this awareness is a growing realization that, "We have not received the spirit of the world but the Spirit that is from God, so that we may understand the things freely given us by God" (1 Cor 2:12).

Notes

                    1. Cf. The Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius, translated by L. Puhl (Westminster: Newman Press, 1951), Nos. 332-334.
                            2.  Ibid., No. 317.
                            3.  Cf. St. Francis de Sales, On the Love of God, translated by J. Ryan (New York:  Doubleday, 1963), Bk VIII, Ch. 13, pp. 84-87.
                            4.  Jean Laplace,  The Direction of Conscience (New York: Herder and Herder, 1967), p.173.
                   

 

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From Death/Resurrection Chapter

we meditate in this Rosary

    One of the most traditional forms of the experience of the cross—that is, of dying with Jesus—that spiritual masters have always treated is self-discipline or asceticism. All forms of life demand self-discipline: The athlete must subject himself or herself to rigorous training; the musician must endure long hours of practice; the doctor must be willing to order his or her life to the rigorous demands of the medical profession.

 

Sorrowful Mysteries

                Agony in the Garden

                (1) Christ suffered for His precious souls that
                    would be lost because of their sin.
                    Christ was in such anguish He sweat blood.

                (2)

    Christ has structured the Christian life by the way he lived, died, and rose from the dead. It is obvious, then, that the pattern of death-resurrection must be at the heart of the Church's life. Individually and collectively, we continually die with Christ so that we may continually rise with him. Thus, we pass over in a process of continued religious transition to a greater participation in Jesus' resurrection. It is true that our participation in Christ's resurrection will reach its completion only in eternity. Nevertheless, we begin the life of resurrection here upon this earth, in the here and now of human life, in the midst of joy and pain, in the experience of success and failure, in the sweat of our brow, in the enjoyment of God's gifts. As Christians, we should have a sense of growth concerning our here-and-now life of resurrection. Some Christians seem to have a rather static view of the Christian life. They do not seem to have a vital and efficacious realization that the Christian life, centered in death-resurrection, should become more conscious, more experiential, more dynamically relative to daily existence.

(3)

    We cannot maintain the life of resurrection or grow in it without a willingness to suffer. This does not mean that we need to feel overwhelmed and heavily burdened by the suffering in our lives. The greater portion of suffering for most Christians seems to be an accumulation of ordinary hardships, difficulties, and pains. At times, however, deep suffering—even suffering of agonizing proportions—can enter one's life. During these oppressive periods of suffering, a person's sense of anguish can become so great that the prospect of continuing life becomes an agony in itself. Whether the sufferings of Christians are of either the ordinary variety or the rare and extreme type, Christians must nevertheless convince themselves that to properly relate to the cross is to grow in resurrection—and for an individual Christian to grow in resurrection means that he or she will also have an increased capacity to help give resurrection to others.

(4)

    The Christian life, too, has its own form of discipline or control that has as its comprehensive purpose the greater assimilation of the Christian's total being to Christ. Christian self-discipline, or asceticism, allows for the proper development of the Christ-life in all its dimensions. Like all forms of authentic discipline, it is at the service of life; when it is properly exercised, asceticism helps us to grow in our capacity to love God and others.

(5)

    This proper, grace-inspired control over the complete person is necessary because the various sense and spiritual faculties do not automatically follow the lead of grace. Because of original sin and personal sin, there are various tendencies within us that, if they are not properly controlled, will lead us away from Christ and our spiritual development. The Christian, therefore, must be willing to

(6)

    Regarding our intellectual lives, there are various tendencies inimical to the spiritual life that must be disciplined. There can be a laziness, for instance, that might prevent the proper pursuit of study that is necessary for our own particular role in the Church. There can be an unwholesome curiosity that might lead us to want to know that which is pleasing, rather than, first of all, that which is necessary. There can be an intellectual pride that might manifest itself in various ways; some people, for example, find it extremely difficult to be open to the ideas of others or to admit their own mistakes.

(7)

    The will, the decisive faculty of the human person, must receive special attention. It must become both supple and strong: supple in order to be open to the varied movements of the Holy Spirit; and strong in order to guide the entire person, including those forces that can so powerfully lead away from God. Concerning concrete decision making, there are two extremes that must be avoided: On the one hand, we must avoid precipitous action that is devoid of reflection that is rooted in an appropriate openness to the movements of the Spirit; on the other hand, we must not fall prey to the habit of indecision. Some people are prone to spending an excessive amount of time in making decisions about even the simplest matters. Life is short, and we must condition ourselves to make decisions after appropriate reflection, which, in many of our ordinary actions and decisions, is practically instantaneous. Unhealthy fear and other factors that are responsible for indecision must be curbed despite the great pain that this can, at times, cause for certain temperaments.

(8)

    The faculties of memory and imagination must also be controlled. These can be of great value if properly guided; if they are not properly guided, however, they can, in their unruliness, become great obstacles to spiritual progress. An undisciplined memory and imagination can, for example, seriously interfere with our prayer life. Similarly, memory and imagination that are not properly controlled can also give rise to numerous temptations against the various virtues.

(9)

    We must also properly control the emotions. A considerable portion of past spiritual literature has not given due allowance to the role that God intends the emotions to exercise. When we speak of controlling the emotions, therefore, we are not suggesting either an aggressive repression or an inhuman rigidity; rather, we speak of a control that permits the emotions to contribute to the richness and overall value of our actions. We must remember that the emotions, when they are properly integrated with the movements of the intellect and will, enhance the goodness of our acts.

(10)    

    It is obvious, however, that we must strive to discipline the emotions' evil tendencies if these emotions are to contribute to spiritual growth. The emotions can cause havoc if such a discipline is lacking. At times, they can reduce a person to an almost brute existence; at other times, they can seriously constrict a person and, consequently, seriously impede the proper exercise and development of the Christian life.

    

 

Scourging at the Pillar

(1) Jesus was whipped for our sins.

    It is obvious, however, that we must strive to discipline the emotions' evil tendencies if these emotions are to contribute to spiritual growth. The emotions can cause havoc if such a discipline is lacking. At times, they can reduce a person to an almost brute existence; at other times, they can seriously constrict a person and, consequently, seriously impede the proper exercise and development of the Christian life.

(2)

    Renunciation is another form of dying with Jesus that, over the ages, has been given much attention in the teaching of the spiritual masters. Indeed, the New Testament itself attests to the undeniable role that renunciation plays in the Christian life. The gentle St. Luke, for example, teaches with a peculiar intransigence Jesus' message of renunciation—a message that Jesus himself lived. Renunciation was by no means the only aspect of Christ's life, but it was an undeniable one. Christians, because they are followers of Christ, must also include renunciation in their lives regardless of their individual vocations. Again, it is well to remind ourselves that the cross is always intended to be connected with life and love. Paradoxically, then, we embrace renunciation for the sake of life. This was the purpose of renunciation in Jesus' life, and it must have the same purpose in the Christian's existence. Let us now consider some of the various ways in which the principle of renunciation applies.

(3)

    Self-discipline or asceticism, which we have already discussed, does not necessarily include the aspect of renunciation. A person can exercise self-discipline in the positive use of created goods, and renunciation would not be involved; rather, the person would be relating to a created good according to God's will. Renunciation is, however, sometimes related to the practice of self-discipline; a person cannot always properly relate his or her total being to God's creation unless, from time to time, he or she is willing to renounce particular goods and values. Consider this example: A person will not always properly employ his or her external senses in using God's creation unless, at times, he or she denies the senses what they naturally desire. If we are not willing to admit this, we are being falsely optimistic about human nature. There is a sinful element within us that inclines us to a misuse of creation. To control this tendency toward misuse, we must exercise renunciation of those goods toward which our various spiritual and sense faculties are oriented.

(4)

    In addition to being an aid to self-discipline, there are other uses of renunciation. The choice of a particular vocation or life's work, for instance, demands a renunciation of various other created goods and values. A person who chooses marriage has to be willing to sacrifice certain values and activities that might well be appropriate for a single person, but are incompatible with the married vocation. The Christian scholar, who is called by God to make his or her contribution to the life of the Church in the academic sphere, must also learn the lesson of renunciation; such a person cannot be true to the demanding work of scholarship unless various human values—all of which are good in themselves—are nevertheless sacrificed.

(5)

    Another use of renunciation is its special witness to the transcendent aspect of the Christian life, one element of which is that our life of grace is a participation in the transcendent life of God. This life has a radical thrust of desiring God as he is in himself; this particular desire will not be completely satisfied until we achieve the beatific vision in which we will possess God as he is in himself, without the mediation of the world. Here on this earth, however, we can, to a certain extent, go out to God as he is in himself. Among the methods for achieving this goal is the practice of renunciation. Speaking of this kind of renunciation, which is expressive of transcendent love of God, Karl Rahner observes: "For such renunciation is either senseless or it is the realized and combined expression of faith, hope and charity which reaches out toward God precisely insofar as he is in himself, and without any mediation of the world, the goal of man in the supernatural order" (Theological Investigations, vol. 3, pp. 51-52). God, then, wants us to seek him not only as he is immanent in creation, but also as he is transcendent in himself. To reiterate, one way to achieve this is through the prudent, periodic renunciation of created goods and values.

(6)

    We have been discussing two main forms of dying with Jesus, namely, self-discipline, or asceticism, and renunciation. These traditional forms of the Christian cross actually permeate the experience of numerous and various kinds of pain, suffering, hardship, bearing with the difficult—whatever name one wishes to apply. Let us consider some of these ways in which we are daily called to mystically share in the death of Jesus.

(7)

    A common form of suffering is the experience of loneliness.

    There are two basic kinds of loneliness—that which need not be and that which cannot be avoided. The first type of loneliness results from the fact that we are not in proper touch with our true selves, with God, or with others; the second type results from our existential situation as wayfarers, as pilgrims, who have not yet arrived at our final destination. The pain that results from the first type need not be, and we should work to eliminate its causes. The suffering and dying that are related to the second kind, however, are inevitable. As Christians, we should use this suffering and dying to grow in various ways, among which is the maturing realization that we have no lasting home here on earth.

(8)

    There is, in addition, the very prosaic type of suffering that is involved in the proper living of each day. There is nothing dramatic about this form of pain, and, precisely because it seems so uneventful, it is very difficult to properly relate to it in a consistent fashion. On particular occasions, we might feel that a quick death by martyrdom would be preferable to the daily dying that involves all sorts of little sufferings. But this daily dying is a precious type of suffering, and to grow in the realization of its importance is a significant sign of spiritual progress. It is a sign that we have the spiritual keenness to comprehend that God so often situates the cross within the ordinariness of everyday life.

(9)

    Crucial decision making is also a distinct form of dying. Making a decision, we realize, is extremely important for both ourselves and others. There might be two possibilities or three or even more. We might seek advice from others, but in the last analysis, we know—oh, how well we know—that, ultimately, we alone must make the decision before God. We pray for light and strength, for we realize that we need help not only to make the proper decision, but also to properly deal with the pain that is inevitably involved.

(10)

    The experience of failure is another suffering that we encounter in various degrees along the path of life. Some fail in their attempts to achieve the type of employment they so much desire; others fail to perform properly once they have been so employed. Some are not very successful in initiating interpersonal relationships; others are not very successful in maintaining the ones in which they do become involved. Some experience failure because they strive to accomplish too little; others experience failure because they strive to do too much. Some encounter failure because they have not given the proper effort; others feel failure's pain despite their conscientious perseverance. In these and in other types of failure there is a double pain—the pain of having failed and the pain in having to begin over again. The pain of having failed, however, must not be wasted; we must use it to become better persons. If we do use it, we are able to cope more maturely with the effort that is involved in beginning afresh.

       Experiencing various types of transition along the path of life also produces its own kind of pain. Periods of transition from one age of life to another are numerous, and some are obviously much more radical than others. The transitions from childhood to adolescence, from adolescence to young adulthood, from young adulthood to middle age, from middle age to old age produce various, and sometimes rather intense, kinds of sufferings. There is the classic kind of pain that adolescents experience, for example, as they grope for some kind of self-identity, as they try to cope with various types of peer pressure, as they struggle for a new kind of relationship with parents because their childhood relationship no longer suffices. These periods of transition, or life-stages, also involve changing interests and goals; that which held our interest at one stage of life leaves us bored at another. To establish a new set of interests and challenges is sometimes painful, but not so painful as the boring vacuum that we must exist in if we fail to replace those now-dead interests and goals with new ones.

 

 

The Crowing with Thorns

(1)

    Rejection, in various forms, is another pain not uncommon to human experience. Rejection because of race, religion, or ethnic origin has been, sad to say, a rather prominent part of our country's history. Blacks, in particular, have felt the wrath of racial rejection and discrimination. Others, too, have not been immune—this group includes, among others, American Indians, Puerto Ricans, and Mexican-Americans.

(2)

    Although we ourselves might not have suffered racial, ethnic, or religious rejection, we are certainly susceptible to other types. We may have experienced, for instance, a certain ostracism in not being accepted—or being only reluctantly accepted—by this or that group, by this or that organization. When our ideas and opinions are not accepted by others, we feel the sting of yet another type of rejection. Further still is that very painful yet all too common rejection of not feeling loved by the person whom we dearly love.

(3)

    The type of rejection that we experience—no matter what it might be—carries with it its own kind and degree of suffering that we can neither deny nor instantaneously cause to go away; we can, however, profit from its painful presence. One of the things we must do in order to grow from the rejection that we experience is to refuse to harbor bitterness against the person or persons who have caused us pain. Not to be bitter can be difficult—at times, it can be very difficult. If we do remain bitter, however, our suffering is increased by a type of pain—the pain of bitterness—that is not growth promoting, but is, rather, pernicious to the well-being of our personality.

(4)

    The experience of various kinds of uncertainty is another type of suffering, or dying. The list of examples of human uncertainty is a long one. There is the uncertainty that is connected with the approach of a first experience: the young doctor who is still in training, for example, is understandably apprehensive as he or she prepares for his or her first surgery. There is the uncertainty of the young man and the young woman who are about to marry. Both begin to realize the uncertainties that are attached to marriage: Am I really marrying the right person? Will the children be normal and healthy? Will my partner love me over a lifetime, or is it possible that love will turn to coldness or even hatred? Likewise, the young businessman wonders whether the financial investment that he is about to make will result in increased earnings or ultimately lead to bankruptcy. There is also that common uncertainty that has plagued men and women of our contemporary age—namely, the question of whether life as we now know it on this earth will suddenly end in a nuclear holocaust.

    Christians, of course, experience these same uncertainties to the same extent that non-Christians experience them. Christians, however, precisely because they are Christians, should react to uncertainty and assimilate it in a manner that will differ from that of non-Christians. The Christian life is, after all, supposed to extend to all the dimensions of authentic human existence—including the experience of uncertainty.

(5)

    There is, however, a way in which Christians experience uncertainty in a manner that differs from non-Christians. There are specific uncertainties that explicitly arise out of Christian practices. Let us consider a few examples. In deciding one's basic state of life, the doubt, confusion, and anxiety that can temporarily accompany a choice of vocation can be agonizingly painful for some people. There are, in addition, the uncertainties and obscurities that, at times, accompany spiritual development in general. In the practice of prayer, for instance, there can be dryness, or an apparent inability to encounter God, even though God is really present to the person. There can also be a certain repugnance as one feels the demanding effort that is required to pray in present circumstances, as well as the bothersome uncertainty that makes us wonder whether our prayer is the proper type for us here and now.

    What is more, various uncertainties surround the seemingly contradictory manifestations of God's will. There might be, for example, a certain indication that God would have us act in a particular way, yet his will, as it is channeled to us from a different perspective, seems to suggest another course of action. Of course, God never contradicts himself; the contradiction is only an apparent one. We are not without pain, however, as we work through the confusion and uncertainty.

(6)

    How should we Christians act in times of uncertainty? We must be conscious of the two great realities of love and trust. First, we must try to be particularly conscious of how much God loves us in Christ. This deepened realization, in turn, will lead us to return that love in such a way that our love will be characterized by an abandoning trust in God's providence for us. Consequently, times of uncertainty can be times of tremendous growth. For we are creatures who all too often can become self-complacent before God; we are prone to forget just how weak and helpless we are without God. The discomfort of uncertainty, then, can help arouse us from this false sense of security because at these times we become more conscious of our helplessness and we approach God for guidance, strength, and consolation.

(7)

    When we experience uncertainty we should also be aware that, although we do not possess all possible light, we do have enough light to properly cope. The general pattern of Christ's life is always before us as an example and can be lived out in circumstances of uncertainty as well as at any other time. We can also utilize particular means that can lessen or even dispel the uncertainty, or that will at least help us to properly cope. Examples of such means are prayer and the seeking of advice from competent persons—if the particular uncertainty indicates that the counsel of another or others would be helpful.

(8)

    We have been discussing some of the specific ways in which we experience suffering. Let us now end this discussion in the same way that we began—by reminding ourselves of suffering's purpose in God's overall plan. Suffering, when it is properly encountered, leads us to a more mature Christian existence, that is, to an increased participation in Jesus' resurrection. If it is unchristian to flee the suffering that God intends for us (we are, of course, allowed to take proper means, as indicated by God's will, to dispel or alleviate suffering), it is also unchristian to view suffering out of perspective. We should view suffering, or dying with Christ, in relation to growth in the life that Jesus came to give us in abundance. As we properly encounter suffering, we are more and more cutting through the layers of the false self and increasingly coming in touch with the true, Christic self. If we live according to this true self, we become more capable of loving God and our fellow human beings. We become more vibrant personalities, more sensitive to the true, the good, the beautiful. We concentrate on the good that God's love has put in creation rather than on the evil therein that results from man's sinfulness.

(9)

    Although we might endure suffering with a proper Christian perspective, this is not to say that we find it easy to suffer. We need constant motivation for the proper assimilation of the suffering that daily faces us. This motivation, in turn, must be centered in the remembrance of the one who has suffered before us:

                Though he was harshly treated, he
                             submitted
                       and opened not his mouth;
                Like a lamb led to the slaughter
                       or a sheep before the shearers,
                       he was silent and opened not his
                             mouth.
                Oppressed and condemned, he was
                             taken away,
                       and who would have thought any
                             more of his destiny?
                When he was cut off from the land of
                             the living,
                       and smitten for the sin of his people,
                A grave was assigned him among the
                             wicked
                       and a burial place with evildoers,
                Though he had done no wrong
                             nor spoken any falsehood.
                                                                 —Is 53:7-9

(10) Read Shepherds of Christ Rule

  

Religious Life
 
and life in the Shepherds of Christ Movement for Servants, Handmaids and Apostles

Carrying of the Cross

(1) Christ carried His cross with our sins.

    Our incorporation into the mystery of Christ at baptism, and the gradual maturing of that life in the process of becoming, is centered in the pattern of death-resurrection. Indeed, the theme of death-resurrection is at the heart of salvation history. Let us briefly consider its place in the Old Testament, in the New Testament, and in God's ongoing self-communication, always remembering that any form of death—that is, any form of suffering—is meant to lead to greater life, greater peace, and greater happiness.

(2)

    The theme of death-resurrection is at the heart of Old Testament history. The Jewish people, under the leadership of Moses, experienced death-resurrection as they were formed into the people of the covenant—Yahweh's people. In the great Exodus event, they escaped Egyptian slavery, went on to Mt. Sinai where the covenant was ratified, and then progressed to the Promised Land. As members of the Mosaic covenant—as Yahweh's people—the Jews experienced a religious transition; they passed over to a higher level of religious existence, to a more intimate union with God.

(3) August 23, 1993 - On His Passion

Jesus: My dear child,
I was condemned to death, death on a cross. They gave Me a big cross and made Me carry it. They stood around and glared at Me. It weighed on My shoulder and I pulled at it until it finally moved. Every step was almost impossible as I dragged it, weighing so heavily on My shoulders.

My shoulder felt as if the bones inside would crack and the cross would fall through to the ground. I couldn’t drag it any more. I tried, I fell. I fell and its weight fell on Me. A guard hit Me with something sharp. It really hurt because he wanted Me to move, and fast! People were watching — on with the show! How dare I fall in the middle of the show! He hit Me again and the blow really stung Me. I got up because it hurt so badly. I tried to walk on.

My Mother was in the crowd. She looked at Me and her face looked red and hurt. Tears rolled down her cheeks like rain and as her eyes met Mine, I was hurt so by her sorrow! She was always by My side, silent and loving. She was My mother of love! She is always there next to you when you suffer.

I fell again and he (the guard) really hit Me. It (the cross) was so heavy that he and I together could barely move it. It seemed as I walked, heavier with the sins of the world heaped on it. My hands were bleeding. Blood ran from the wounds of My thorns and My head throbbed, seeming to make the wounds in My head bleed even more. Some of the Blood was dried, some of it running all over My Body. I had so many cuts and bruises — and people watched and laughed!

I am Jesus, Son of the Living God, and they laughed and mimicked Me! Oh, such hardened hearts! How vile can men’s heart become? The devil’s grip is paralyzing and crippling.

The walk was so long up a hill and over rocks — the cross had to be lifted over the rocks. My Body was bleeding so badly! My heart was pounding. I knew that the salvation of all men depended on My love. Therefore, I went through such agony.

I thought of My intense love for you — that many would go to heaven because of My suffering — and I continued to the top of the hill. At the top they laid Me on the cross and with a big hammer nailed My hands to it. It was the worst (suffering) yet. My hands were nailed with big nails and the big hammer. Oh, it was unbelievable! Then, as if that weren’t enough, with a big nail they nailed through both feet.

Then they lifted the cross and banged it into (a hole in) the ground. My shoulders ached from how I hung. My head bobbed and My neck ached and they laughed and said, "Now save Yourself." I hurt so much! I suffered this way for hours — which seemed like forever — and they glared at Me and laughed! My Mother watched in such agony.

For love of you, to My death I gave you My Body. My child, I shed My Blood and gave you My life that you might be with Me forever in heaven — not for a day, a month or a year, but forever with Me in heaven.

I am the true Bread come down from heaven. He who eats My Flesh will have life forever. For the drink I give you is My Blood and food you eat is My Body. Who would lay down his life for a friend? I did, for you. I love you this much, child. Forget about those who reject you. You have My life that I gave you and I give you life eternal.

I am the One true God. I am the Light of life. He who abides in Me will have life eternal, for the drink I give is My Blood and the food I give is My Body. Drink and eat and have everlasting life.

My child, that is all you need to know. Love one another and be good that you may enter into My kingdom.

end of August 23, 1993

(4)

    This religious transition contained death-resurrection. For the Jews to become people of the covenant, to remain so, and to grow in the life of the covenant, it was necessary that they undergo a mystical or spiritual death. In short, the Jews had to be willing to pay a price; they had to be willing to bear with that which was difficult in covenant life; they had to be willing to die to that which was not according to Yahweh's will. This mystical death, however, had a very positive purpose; it was directed at life in the covenant and at growth in that life. This spiritual death, in other words, was aimed at resurrection.

    Christ perfectly fulfilled the Old Testament theme of death-resurrection. In doing so, he, too, was experiencing a religious transition. He was passing over—gradually, at first, and then definitively in his death—to a new kind of existence, to the life of his resurrection, which he achieved not only for himself, but for all mankind. To achieve this new life of resurrection, Jesus was willing to pay the price; Jesus was willing to suffer, even unto death. That it had to be this way—that the only way Christ could have achieved resurrection was through suffering and death—was pointed out by Jesus himself to the two disciples on the road to Emmaus: "Then he said to them, 'What little sense you have! How slow you are to believe all that the prophets have announced! Did not the Messiah have to undergo all this so as to enter into his glory?' Beginning, then, with Moses and all the prophets, he interpreted for them every passage of Scripture which referred to him" (Lk 24:25-27).

(5)

    Christ has structured the Christian life by the way he lived, died, and rose from the dead. It is obvious, then, that the pattern of death-resurrection must be at the heart of the Church's life. Individually and collectively, we continually die with Christ so that we may continually rise with him. Thus, we pass over in a process of continued religious transition to a greater participation in Jesus' resurrection. It is true that our participation in Christ's resurrection will reach its completion only in eternity. Nevertheless, we begin the life of resurrection here upon this earth, in the here and now of human life, in the midst of joy and pain, in the experience of success and failure, in the sweat of our brow, in the enjoyment of God's gifts. As Christians, we should have a sense of growth concerning our here-and-now life of resurrection. Some Christians seem to have a rather static view of the Christian life. They do not seem to have a vital and efficacious realization that the Christian life, centered in death-resurrection, should become more conscious, more experiential, more dynamically relative to daily existence.

(6)

    We cannot maintain the life of resurrection or grow in it without a willingness to suffer. This does not mean that we need to feel overwhelmed and heavily burdened by the suffering in our lives. The greater portion of suffering for most Christians seems to be an accumulation of ordinary hardships, difficulties, and pains. At times, however, deep suffering—even suffering of agonizing proportions—can enter one's life. During these oppressive periods of suffering, a person's sense of anguish can become so great that the prospect of continuing life becomes an agony in itself. Whether the sufferings of Christians are of either the ordinary variety or the rare and extreme type, Christians must nevertheless convince themselves that to properly relate to the cross is to grow in resurrection—and for an individual Christian to grow in resurrection means that he or she will also have an increased capacity to help give resurrection to others.

(7)

    One of the most traditional forms of the experience of the cross—that is, of dying with Jesus—that spiritual masters have always treated is self-discipline or asceticism. All forms of life demand self-discipline: The athlete must subject himself or herself to rigorous training; the musician must endure long hours of practice; the doctor must be willing to order his or her life to the rigorous demands of the medical profession.

(8)

    The Christian life, too, has its own form of discipline or control that has as its comprehensive purpose the greater assimilation of the Christian's total being to Christ. Christian self-discipline, or asceticism, allows for the proper development of the Christ-life in all its dimensions. Like all forms of authentic discipline, it is at the service of life; when it is properly exercised, asceticism helps us to grow in our capacity to love God and others.

(9)

    This proper, grace-inspired control over the complete person is necessary because the various sense and spiritual faculties do not automatically follow the lead of grace. Because of original sin and personal sin, there are various tendencies within us that, if they are not properly controlled, will lead us away from Christ and our spiritual development. The Christian, therefore, must be willing to exercise a reasonable self-discipline despite the difficulty that is involved. Moreover, this control must extend to all of the person's faculties.

(10) February 27, 1997

         Rita Ring
         After the Death, There is the Resurrection

My love affair is with You, my crucified Lord. I kiss Your cross and caress You tenderly. I smoother You with kisses and I know Your love.

This is love - to kiss the cross of Christ. I cursed the darkness and the light came across the sky, ever so gently as if it grew in intensity to a bright brilliant shade of glistening light. And in this I beheld my Beloved. I saw His glory in the wonders of the earth and I embraced Him, the divine, all-powerful, all Almighty Lord!

He took away those things I was attached to. I held on with a gripping hand. Oh, I cried out in pain and I heard the words in my heart: beyond the surrender is the real gift.

Is it not after the death there is the resurrection, after the dying, there is the glory?

Oh, my Divine Lord, I feel as if my eyes have crusted over. I laid down on the floor and pounded my fists to the earth. I did not see the miracle in the grass that touched my hand. I did not see the power and the might behind the work of endless beauty. A blade of grass, you say? Oh, yes indeed, for it lives and is not life the real miracle? For I am not a rock, but a living creature, created in the image and likeness of God and oh, you say, how much do you share in the life of the Divine Being? And I say, "I share through Baptism. He, God, gives me a sharing in His divine life!"

I pounded the earth and I cursed the darkness. I scoffed and I complained and beyond the horizon the sun slowly stole across the sky and the light appeared in glistening glory. The darkness was black and the night was cold. I heard the clamor of fear in my heart. I felt like screaming in that night and oh, I beheld the crucified Lord. He spoke no words to me, the Holy Spirit filled my heart with light and I saw the glory. I saw the resurrection, not with my earthly eyes, but with the awakening of a joyous heart within.

I saw the glorified wounds, the wounds once covered with blood, inflamed and red, gushing with deep, red blood. I saw the glistening wounds in the hands and feet and I knew behind His robe was the most tender of all wounds, the piercing wound to His side. It was there, the pierced wound of His most precious Heart. It was the wound of glory, from which His divine life would pour forth to a hungry Church. It would rain and fall as gently as the new fallen snow. It would go across the sky like the light and the souls would be transformed into the whitest light. The graced soul, oh, the glory of this soul, the soul that is filled with His divine life!

Oh, need I say more, my Lord? I see the life in a blade of grass. I see the tiniest potato bug with its dots and beauty and I behold the face of God. I behold life, His life, alive in us and in the world.

Well, the night was black, as black as black could be and the cold pierced my bones. I felt its chill go through my entire body and I wanted to scream and it happened—He gave me an outpouring of His life in my soul and my darkness was truly turned to light, another light, not the light of the eyes, a light of knowing God, the joy of beholding His heavenly embrace, the great illumination of another mystery. Oh, sweet gifts He gives when He gives me new knowledge of Himself. Sweet gifts He gives when, in an instant, I pray my rosary and the Holy Spirit fills my heart with lights and the mystery lights up and I know, I just know and I experience a great insight into God.

This is the reason for this letter, for I laid in my bed and I wanted to cry and I was deeply afraid for the devils pressed in as rocks poking at me and hurting my precious skin. I laid in bed and I went into the womb of my Mother and I asked for the Holy Spirit to flood me with His light and it came. I speak His words to you, they are the words He gives: death-resurrection, darkness-light, sorrow-joy, suffering and pain, but oh, the joy of His light, the joy of His glory, the sacrifice I offer to Him that He turns into blessings and I experience His glory. It is in the death there is the resurrection. It is in the anguishing days of lent we come to the glory of Easter.

So, my dear brothers, I walk the road to Calvary. I mount the cross and I die. I offer sacrifice and in the morning when the night is done I see the glory of the resurrection. I experience His joy in my heart.

So I went to bed and went into the womb of my Mother and the Holy Spirit flooded me with light and I united deeply to my precious Jesus on the cross. I knew Him and His love. I reminisced on all the places of deepest intimacy I had shared with Him and my heart burned. I wanted Him so close and I loved Him so much. I cried out, "I love You, I love You, I love You." In that moment I knew and wanted only Him. He had removed my bonds and set me free to be engulfed by His divine love. I then knew Him as never before, the most Holy One, in this union with Jesus.

I felt my great love for God the Father. I have been experiencing my littleness as a child and knowing my Father, seeing myself real little and knowing my Father and wanting, as a little child, to please Him. Then tonight I realized more His Fatherly love. I see myself depending on Him, needing Him, crying to Him, loving Him and then I realized His power and might and love coming to me.

So I knew in an instant. He just gives you a light and you know, you experience—I knew, I experienced the Trinity. I loved Them, all three Persons, so much and I loved Them as one, my heart, being consumed with the presence of God and sharing the love of each Person—love beyond all love, and I stopped to be in this embrace, wanting it to never end, for in this embrace I felt peace, a peace I had not felt before, so different from the days that proceeded this moment, the days of suffering and trial.

I mounted the cross. I felt the nails press deeply into my hands and feet. I felt the crown of thorns on my head. I said to Him, "Oh, why, my God, if You love me, do You make it so hard?"

And then I saw Him on the cross. I saw His mouth with blood running from the corner of it. I saw the body of a man, close to death. I saw His wounds, blistery and red, pouring out His precious blood. I saw the hollowness of His cheeks and the exhaustion of a body ready to expire in death. I saw the anguishing Lord who came to show us His way. His way is death and resurrection. His way is pain and glory. His way is the way to eternal life.

John 19: 25-27

Near the cross of Jesus stood his mother and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary of Magdala. Seeing his mother and the disciple whom he loved standing near her, Jesus said to his mother, ‘Woman, this is your son.’ Then to the disciple he said, ‘This is your mother.’ And from that hour the disciple took her into his home.

From The Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius, 
    by Louis J. Puhl, S.J. p. 12

                        23. FIRST PRINCIPLE AND FOUNDATION

                            Man is created to praise, reverence and serve God 
                        our Lord, and by this means to save his soul.

p.11

21.                     SPIRITUAL EXERCISES

    Which have as their purpose the conquest of self
    and the regulation of one's life in such a way that
    no decision is made under the influence of any
    inordinate attachment

From the Priestly Newsletter Book III - 2000 Issue 3

The Father's Will for Us  - Our Source of Peace

• Pope John Paul II instructs us: "The Church, as a reconciled and reconciling community, cannot forget that at the source of her gift and mission of reconciliation is the initiative, full of compassionate love and mercy, of that God who is love (see 1 John 4:8) and who out of love created human beings (see Wisdom 11:23-26; Genesis 1:27: Psalms 8:4-8)…He created them so that they might live in friendship with Him and in communion with one another.

"God is faithful to His eternal plan even when man, under the impulse of the evil one (see Wisdom 2:24) and carried away by his own pride, abuses the freedom given to him in order to love and generously seek what is good, and (instead) refuses to obey his Lord and Father. God is faithful even when man, instead of responding with love to God’s love, opposes Him and treats Him like a rival, deluding himself and relying on his own power, with the resulting break of relationship with the One who created him. In spite of this transgression on man’s part, God remains faithful in love.

"It is certainly true that the story of the Garden of Eden makes us think about the tragic consequences of rejecting the Father, which becomes evident in man’s inner disorder and in the breakdown of harmony between man and woman, brother and brother (see Genesis 3:12 ff; 4:1-16). Also significant is the Gospel parable of the two brothers (the parable of the ‘prodigal son’; see Luke 15:11-32) who, in different ways, distance themselves from their father and cause a rift between them. Refusal of God’s fatherly love and of His loving gifts is always at the root of humanity’s divisions.

"But we know that God…like the father in the parable (of the prodigal son), does not close His heart to any of His children. He waits for them, looks for them, goes to meet them at the place where the refusal of communion imprisons them in isolation and division. He calls them to gather about His table in the joy of the feast of forgiveness and reconciliation.

"This initiative on God’s part is made concrete and manifest in the redemptive act of Christ, which radiates through the world by means of the ministry of the Church." ¹³

13. Pope John Paul II, as in Celebrate 2000!, Servant Publications, pp. 140-141.

 

I Died for You

February 23, 1994

Jesus: I want this emotion in the letter I told you to write. I, Jesus, Son of God, talk to you with such emotion! I am He Who died a brutal death for love of you. I died for you! I love you this much, to give My Life! Yet you couldn't even write when I asked you. You must do exactly as I say. I do not want you ever to say no to Me!

I have such emotion! I am telling you how I died a brutal death and you, My child, did not write for Me! What more can I do? What more do they want? You put others before Me or you would do as I command. I want you to do as I tell you every moment.

I am the Lord. I am the Son of God. Such emotion I let you feel for My death. I died. I am a person. I was human and I died for you. Think of yourself giving your life for someone and they do not care. What can I do to shake you? What more can I say? I am here and I am loving you and pleading with you to listen to Me with this emotion that God is telling you. I am Jesus. I died for you. I gave My life for you and do you even listen, My little sweet one? You didn't want to write it for My children. When I give you a command, you write. When I say do, you do. Selflessness! I am pushing you because I need your total surrender. Do not ever deny My writing to My loved ones. You have a responsibility. I don't care where you are when I talk. I am God and I talk to you. I am so present to you.

Listen. I need your selflessness. I need your surrender. I need your life, given for love of Me and Me alone. I need you to be the light that shines on the hill, that does not go in and out but is constant in My love. I need your commitment. I need your attention at every moment. I am feeding you My words every moment on paper and in your hand. You must obey Me exactly as I command. No questions, only action. I want action. Now! You write when I say write. I don't care where you are. You worry not for others. I am giving you the mighty medicine. Would you tell the doctor to wait? I am God and I do not ever want to wait while you play a safe game with Me. When I say do something, I want you to do it. You are My beloved and I am filling you with fire.

I am pushing you to do that which I need done. Do not ever stop to look around. Keep your focus on Me and My commands for you. I am using you every moment. I must be able to count on your constant consent to do My will immediately! I am calling you to this work and I want you to comply. I love you ardently. I am so full of love for you. Focus on this and this alone. I am Who am. I am God, child. Do not ever hesitate. Do not doubt or think. You must act as I act in you or My work will not be done.

Be selfless about My commands. You will do My work. You will spread My words of love and create emotion with My songs and I will use you to bring My flock to My love. I love every soul! You must spread My love.

Note: (Meditating on the Crucifixion) Going to Mass at the seminary at 8:00 a.m. was rushed. He said to me, "Where are you going, child. Do you not feel My presence with you?" A calm came over me. Then He started lamenting how He died for us, how He is a true person and He loves us so much. He said, "I died for you."

R. He gave His life for us. He is the little lamb led to the slaughter out of love for us. He said, "I need you to do this work now and I am pushing you." He was so upset! He died for us. He loves us so much as to give His life.

He begged me to spread His love, to tell others how He, bloodied, bruised and beaten, gave us His life.

Jesus: I am God. I am God. I died. Spread My love now! Now! Now! Now! Now! I am begging you not to hold back! Read these letters now, read and learn about My love. I beckon you to speak of My love. Shout it from the high roof. Proclaim it in the cities. Jesus Christ died for love of you and He is risen! I am He Who is God and I died for you!

Listen and preach My love and emotion here. Priests will create little cities, little cities in each church to spread the light of Christ to this sick world. Each priest can create his own little city, a powerhouse of God's love. God has all the power. His power is endless. It never runs out. It is might. You have no power except through Him. Churches filled with the intimate love of Jesus will be powerhouses.

I am God, My little ones. God can do all things. I can make your cities light up the darkness. I am the Way, the Truth, the Life. I am the light of life. I am God! I can do all things. I want to act in you. You need to be in constant union with Me. My priests, you need to be selfless. My soul and yours are one. I want to act in you.

Hold not back. Pray the Prayer for Union with Me.

end of February 23, 1994