February 10, 2007 - 5:00am

Messenger:            When you are blind you are
                                    missing it.

                            There are only so many days to
                                    our life.

                            So many decisions for each day we
                                    make.

                            They can depend on how we feel.

                            Every day we get up and can fall
                                into a pit of taking that day
                                into the ground or being a
                                day we live in light —

                            Free will and

                            Blindness go together —

                            The more we choose to give into our
                                temptations of living a "sorry"
                                day
                                the more we can be giving into
                                the devil running our day.

                            Choosing your will over God
                                            your will over your superior
                                            your will based on your
                                            feelings is opening the
                                            door to letting
                                        satan run the show.

                            Satan battles us to choose ways that
                                lead to our own misery.

                            Never giving into negative feelings,
                                not blaming others will help
                                us to feel good.

                            Eve and Adam blamed each other
                                in the garden.

                            Cain's sin was more grave
                                his sin was premeditated.

                            Just as a person - can choose
                            light and go more and more into the
                            things that encourage and love and
                            have peace

                            One can choose anger
                                                    blaming
                                                    hate

                            At a certain point on the way
                                down — one may expect —
                                a "pop-up" —
                                to turn them around —

                            Negative thoughts are like snow-
                                balls down a hill —

                            they just seem to keep getting bigger
                                and bigger — faster and faster

                                It is harder to push a snow
                            ball up a hill — one must fight
                            human nature, but in the end —
                            the snow ball grows

                                We used to make snow ball forts —
                            I loved - snow ball forts — we put all
                            the big snow balls together and
                            had a wall —

                                Some snowballs were dirty —
                            some - nice and white, but they all
                            were used for the snow ball fort —

                            I can look at this two ways —

                                We all add our snow balls — the
                            days of our lives to the fort — some of
                            us come with easy balls we got
                            going down hill — satan wants us
                            to give into him and go down hill
                            to make our snow - balls, but
                            going against God's will and doing
                            ours is really a dirty snow
                            ball for us and then we add it
                            on to the walls of our lives —
                            What stops us from making easy
                            snow balls for our fort —

                                Nobody comes and changes our stubborn
                            heart, but us, but satan can control
                            the situation when we give into
                            our feelings to "be in charge"
                            against God's will.

                                "Be in charge" against God's will
                            That's like Eve in the garden —
                            she did her own will against
                            God — look how all her children
                            suffered.

                                Making my snow ball and pushing
                            it up hill may be like working
                            against my human nature — it
                            is very hard to fight negative
                            tapes.

                                A person can start to give in so much
                            they live a distorted view of reality
                            in their mind.

                                That is why we have to, besides our
                            thoughts, have trust worthy people
                            we trust to help us in living
                            to promote God's Kingdom —

                                but they all have human
                            nature so they will never act
                            completely perfect —

                                but that is no excuse to say
                            "the devil made me do it"
                            and allow ourselves to stay where
                            we can blame others and not
                            constantly be working to be renewed
                            by God's grace working in us — if
                            we seek His grace and cooperate with
                            it.

                                I had a dream and a lady said
                            to me — once you keep putting
                            on weight how can you ever
                            get it off —

                                It is really hard once you put
                            on weight to take it off —

                                But once we give into ourselves
                            and do our will and not God's will
                            it is like the weight issue —

                                We are helping ourselves act
                            quicker in the wrong direction.

                                Discipline in all things —

                                Spiritual ways to control ourselves —
                            but we may reason —
                                "the devil made me do it"
                                We cannot blame the devil —
                                in the end we can have
                                power over the devil

                            We have control of our will —
                                God loves us so much —

                            He wants us to love Him —
                            He wants us to choose His will —
                            He wants us to discipline ourselves —
                                even when satan is trying to
                                grip us.

                            Negative habits hurt us when
                                we give into them —

                            Giving into our human nature —
                                    jealousy —
                                    envy
                                    lust
                                    *anger
                                    etc.

                            Is the struggle of our life.

                                My grandchildren watch "Dora"
                            and Dora has an adventure and a map
                            and Dora follows it with Boots —
                            usually 3 things she has to do, to
                            for example, "get to star mountain"
                            Our life is like this on the spiritual
                            journey, Sometimes alligators can
                            get us if we get in the alligator
                            pond —

                                Nobody wants to admit they were
                            wrong — many when they were
                            very wrong caught with their
                            hand in the cookie jar

                            This keeps us stuck —
                            Pride keeps us stuck —
                            It is hard to change —

                            We must will to be more pure
                            We must will to follow God's way
                            We must will to not give into
                                human nature to dominate
                                when God calls us to be under
                                someone in authority.

                            Slick ways to dominate another
                                emotionally because of wanting
                                control can be because of
                                bad habits,

                            but in the end it is an act of
                                the will when we give into
                                human nature and dominate or try
                                to dominate others over us —
                                trying to make the structure weak

                            God works in structure
                            God gives us the commandments to obey
                                not bend our way, with our
                                rules —

                            When we write our own commandments
                                and judge others with malice —
                                we have a hateful life.

                            There is a character on the way to
                                star mountain and
                                he tries to swipe what Dora
                                has — usually the map

                            The devil can be like this —

                            Dora and Boots usually win and
                                "Swiper" (that is the swiper's
                                name) says
                                "Oh man"

                            My grandchild says at 2
                                "Oh man" — "Oh man" —
                                It is so cute

                            We learn at 2 to do God's will  —
                                we are learning about structure —
                                2 year olds are learning to obey —

                            We can be like that in the spiritual
                            life if we don't obey God's rules —
                            if we keep doing our own will —
                            we may not even be at the 2 year
                            old faze of learning obedience

                                Obedience to God's will is what
                                    we do in heaven

                                We are in complete accord
                                    with God

                                We have to please God here below
                                    and do His will to get into
                                    heaven

                            Pride is the enemy to
                                the spiritual life —
                                It keeps us stuck
                                in our ways —

                                God allows us to be tested —
                            He gives us a free will and we fall —
                            this tells us how we cannot
                            be prideful — we are weak —
                            we are sinners, we hurt others,
                            pride keeps us stuck.