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February 27, 1997
Rita Ring
After the Death, There is the Resurrection

My love affair is with You, my crucified Lord. I kiss Your cross and caress You tenderly. I smoother You with kisses and I know Your love.

This is love - to kiss the cross of Christ. I cursed the darkness and the light came across the sky, ever so gently as if it grew in intensity to a bright brilliant shade of glistening light. And in this I beheld my Beloved. I saw His glory in the wonders of the earth and I embraced Him, the divine, all-powerful, all Almighty Lord!

He took away those things I was attached to. I held on with a gripping hand. Oh, I cried out in pain and I heard the words in my heart: beyond the surrender is the real gift.

Is it not after the death there is the resurrection, after the dying, there is the glory?

Oh, my Divine Lord, I feel as if my eyes have crusted over. I laid down on the floor and pounded my fists to the earth. I did not see the miracle in the grass that touched my hand. I did not see the power and the might behind the work of endless beauty. A blade of grass, you say? Oh, yes indeed, for it lives and is not life the real miracle? For I am not a rock, but a living creature, created in the image and likeness of God and oh, you say, how much do you share in the life of the Divine Being? And I say, "I share through Baptism. He, God, gives me a sharing in His divine life!"

I pounded the earth and I cursed the darkness. I scoffed and I complained and beyond the horizon the sun slowly stole across the sky and the light appeared in glistening glory. The darkness was black and the night was cold. I heard the clamor of fear in my heart. I felt like screaming in that night and oh, I beheld the crucified Lord. He spoke no words to me, the Holy Spirit filled my heart with light and I saw the glory. I saw the resurrection, not with my earthly eyes, but with the awakening of a joyous heart within.

I saw the glorified wounds, the wounds once covered with blood, inflamed and red, gushing with deep, red blood. I saw the glistening wounds in the hands and feet and I knew behind His robe was the most tender of all wounds, the piercing wound to His side. It was there, the pierced wound of His most precious Heart. It was the wound of glory, from which His divine life would pour forth to a hungry Church. It would rain and fall as gently as the new fallen snow. It would go across the sky like the light and the souls would be transformed into the whitest light. The graced soul, oh, the glory of this soul, the soul that is filled with His divine life!

Oh, need I say more, my Lord? I see the life in a blade of grass. I see the tiniest potato bug with its dots and beauty and I behold the face of God. I behold life, His life, alive in us and in the world.

Well, the night was black, as black as black could be and the cold pierced my bones. I felt its chill go through my entire body and I wanted to scream and it happened--He gave me an outpouring of His life in my soul and my darkness was truly turned to light, another light, not the light of the eyes, a light of knowing God, the joy of beholding His heavenly embrace, the great illumination of another mystery. Oh, sweet gifts He gives when He gives me new knowledge of Himself. Sweet gifts He gives when, in an instant, I pray my rosary and the Holy Spirit fills my heart with lights and the mystery lights up and I know, I just know and I experience a great insight into God.

This is the reason for this letter, for I laid in my bed and I wanted to cry and I was deeply afraid for the devils pressed in as rocks poking at me and hurting my precious skin. I laid in bed and I went into the womb of my Mother and I asked for the Holy Spirit to flood me with His light and it came. I speak His words to you, they are the words He gives: death-resurrection, darkness-light, sorrow-joy, suffering and pain, but oh, the joy of His light, the joy of His glory, the sacrifice I offer to Him that He turns into blessings and I experience His glory. It is in the death there is the resurrection. It is in the anguishing days of lent we come to the glory of Easter.

So, my dear brothers, I walk the road to Calvary. I mount the cross and I die. I offer sacrifice and in the morning when the night is done I see the glory of the resurrection. I experience His joy in my heart.

So I went to bed and went into the womb of my Mother and the Holy Spirit flooded me with light and I united deeply to my precious Jesus on the cross. I knew Him and His love. I reminisced on all the places of deepest intimacy I had shared with Him and my heart burned. I wanted Him so close and I loved Him so much. I cried out, "I love You, I love You, I love You." In that moment I knew and wanted only Him. He had removed my bonds and set me free to be engulfed by His divine love. I then knew Him as never before, the most Holy One, in this union with Jesus.

I felt my great love for God the Father. I have been experiencing my littleness as a child and knowing my Father, seeing myself real little and knowing my Father and wanting, as a little child, to please Him. Then tonight I realized more His Fatherly love. I see myself depending on Him, needing Him, crying to Him, loving Him and then I realized His power and might and love coming to me.

So I knew in an instant. He just gives you a light and you know, you experience--I knew, I experienced the Trinity. I loved Them, all three Persons, so much and I loved Them as one, my heart, being consumed with the presence of God and sharing the love of each Person--love beyond all love, and I stopped to be in this embrace, wanting it to never end, for in this embrace I felt peace, a peace I had not felt before, so different from the days that proceeded this moment, the days of suffering and trial.

I mounted the cross. I felt the nails press deeply into my hands and feet. I felt the crown of thorns on my head. I said to Him, "Oh, why, my God, if You love me, do You make it so hard?"

And then I saw Him on the cross. I saw His mouth with blood running from the corner of it. I saw the body of a man, close to death. I saw His wounds, blistery and red, pouring out His precious blood. I saw the hollowness of His cheeks and the exhaustion of a body ready to expire in death. I saw the anguishing Lord who came to show us His way. His way is death and resurrection. His way is pain and glory. His way is the way to eternal life.

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Copyright © 1997 Shepherds of Christ Publications
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form without the written permission of the publisher. For information contact Shepherds of Christ Publications
First Printing: August, 1997