R. Endurance, many times we have to endure
                something - a pain, suffering, a sickness –
                trying to do the will of God.

                    Endurance – because we may be sick
                or have to just wait on God.

                    We have so many days here to serve God –
                So many days and then we will be called
                home.

                    Dear God help us to keep our focus on
                You and to control ourselves. Help us to
                do Thy holy will. Help us to be content
                in our vocation – doing what we do
                for Your honor and glory.

                    We have lots of pictures we took
                of our lives, our relationships –
                God calls us to live so many days
                here for Him.

                    We just can't force ourselves
                to do more than we can do. We can do
                what God wants. Trying to feel our
                way through life to be where God
                wants us and not to do too much or
                too little of a thing – just what
                God is calling us to do.

                    Sometimes we can really throw
                ourselves out doing something, somebody
                is trying to get us to do – that is
                not what God wants at all.

                    We really slow down, if God didn't
                put some stopping "skids" in us
                as we grow older.

                    Realizing we can't do everything we
                used to do, but doing what God wants
                us to do so we don't treat ourselves
                like an egg carried across a room.

                    We were wonderfully made by God.

                    He took us through the life we have here
                growing and doing many things.

                    A child can look like their father
                or mother. God created us in the
                image and likeness of Jesus and we
                are to grow more and more in this
                image and likeness.

                    We were made in the image of God!

                    We are His. He made us. We are
                wonderfully made.

                    I love this Gospel.
 

Matthew 20: 1-16

‘Now the kingdom of Heaven is like a landowner going out at daybreak to hire workers for his vineyard. He made an agreement with the workers for one denarius a day and sent them to his vineyard. Going out at about the third hour he saw others standing idle in the market place and said to them, "You go to my vineyard too and I will give you a fair wage." So they went. At about the sixth hour and again at about the ninth hour, he went out and did the same. Then at about the eleventh hour he went out and found more men standing around, and he said to them, "Why have you been standing here idle all day?" "Because no one has hired us," they answered. He said to them, "You go into my vineyard too." In the evening, the owner of the vineyard said to his bailiff, "Call the workers and pay them their wages, starting with the last arrivals and ending with the first." So those who were hired at about the eleventh hour came forward and received one denarius each. When the first came, they expected to get more, but they too received one denarius each. They took it, but grumbled at the landowner saying, "The men who came last have done only one hour, and you have treated them the same as us, though we have done a heavy day’s work in all the heat." He answered one of them and said, "My friend, I am not being unjust to you; did we not agree on one denarius? Take your earnings and go. I choose to pay the lastcomer as much as I pay you. Have I no right to do what I like with my own? Why should you be envious because I am generous?" Thus the last will be first, and the first, last.’  

                R. We are here and God created us
                uniquely for a purpose. The purpose
                is uniquely ours.

                    God wants us to work with
                others in love. He gave us the
                commandments to live by –

                    We are to love God with our whole heart,
                our whole soul and our whole being and love
                our neighbor as ourselves.

                    This takes God's grace to do this –
                God is the source of love. We are
                most likened to God when we love.

                    Life is good. We are here to live
                it as God wants us to. We live the
                life, death and resurrection of
                Jesus in our lives –

                We must be committed to live our life
                the way God wants. This takes effort –
                this takes attitude, this takes surrender
                to do His will –

                    This takes keeping our focus on God!
                God is first – He is our Master – He
                gives us His law –

                    We are here to do what God wants –
                to work at it – to give it all we got
                every day because we have a relationship
                with God and others we love.

                    We are accountable and responsible
                before God and we realize our
                actions have consequences in God's
                plan –

                    We have to walk hand-in-hand –
                be willing to let people know us –
                know we aren't perfect –
                be a person –
                not come and try to ignore everybody else
                    and do our own will –
                like a drummer beating his own
                    drum – while the orchestra
                    is playing –

                We need to be committed to be what
                    God wants us to be – to do
                    things for love. Our attitude is
                    commitment and love – enthusiasm –
                    we are God's servants here below –

                We never forget that!
                   

Prayer for Union with Jesus

Come to me, Lord, and possess my soul. Come into my heart and permeate my soul. Help me to sit in silence with You and let You work in my heart.

    I am Yours to possess. I am Yours to use. I want to be selfless and only exist in You. Help me to spoon out all that is me and be an empty vessel ready to be filled by You. Help me to die to myself and live only for You. Use me as You will. Let me never draw my attention back to myself. I only want to operate as You do, dwelling within me.

    I am Yours, Lord. I want to have my life in You. I want to do the will of the Father. Give me the strength to put aside the world and let You operate my very being. Help me to act as You desire. Strengthen me against the distractions of the devil to take me from Your work.

    When I worry, I have taken my focus off of You and placed it on myself. Help me not to give in to the promptings of others to change what in my heart You are making very clear to me. I worship You, I adore You and I love You. Come and dwell in me now.

-God's Blue Book, January 17, 1994

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                Excerpt from September 24, 2017 Sunday's writing

                    Rising to new life, greater and greater,
                takes vision – Do we dare surrender and
                say with the giving of ourselves
                "Come to me Lord and Possess my Soul"
                "Come into my heart and permeate my soul"
                We have to really let go to Him – let go that
                we should worry once we surrendered
                that He would not do what we thought
                He should do –

                But that is not surrender – A small child
                has to trust his parents – let go and
                surrender because he is entirely dependent
                on them.

                We have to be like that little small child –
                that surrenders to Our heavenly Father who is
                really there in all the suffering and struggles,
                in the tests for endurance, in the morning
                after a night of pain and then again –
                we trust and surrender and we learn
                this. We learn endurance, we learn
                that God increases faith and hope in
                us as we surrender – We are given the
                greater gift as a little child – so
                dependent on their Father –

                Come to me Lord and possess my soul –
                Come into my heart and permeate my soul –

                And we can be tempted to give in – when
                God is asking us to endure and trust –
                A lesson we need to learn – A lesson He
                is teaching – even in the smallest thing –
                A love for Him to have this relationship
                of love so deep we can touch the vision
                God gives us – not with earthly vision –
                but the vision of the soul –

                    The Father's vision, the Father's Plan –
                our energy is given to this – not to worry,
                control, doing needless tasks because
                of anxiety that makes things fall apart.

                    "Wait on the Lord and He will grant
                your hearts requests"

                    The time of endurance and suffering
                may open up a new world with the
                strength of God behind it, but if you don't
                wait – when God calls us to – you will
                not see Him working in the miracle –
                Seeing through the eyes of God –
                Seeing the miracles in our life –
                Not with earthly vision, but with
                    the eyes of the soul –

                Whatever He is teaching us today to
                wait on the Lord and be
                attentive in love to answer His call when
                He makes Himself clear
                    For if He calls us and we say "no"
                let me bury the dead, let me do this
                first, let me make you wait on me
                Lord – we are not surrendering to Him
                at all –

                    Relationship – Relationship – Relationship,
                Love, dependency on God, being ready,
                waiting, doing the job when He calls –
                knowing when to sit and when to stand –
                seeing the unseen, reaching with the
                eyes of God –

                    Loving God first – giving our hearts
                like Jesus taught us on the cross –
                surrendering when God calls us to surrender –
                acting when God calls us to act –
                Praying to God to fill us – so we have
                more and more oneness in Him –
                So we can say with St. Paul –

                R. Will we be there to answer?

                Will we be waiting for Him?

                Will we do "junk" because we were
                    anxious – "junk" that made us
                    like the foolish virgins – that
                    missed the call of the bridegroom –

                    "Yes" Jesus is knocking at the door
                of our heart – RIGHT NOW
 

                    R. Do we have an agenda or are
                    we the bride waiting for the groom –

                He loves us – what He brings is love –
                    But we must be ready to say "yes" –
                    "yes" like Mary – in suffering and in joy –

                Fr. Carter would say –
                "Does it matter if God asks for us to carry
                    a pebble or a boulder"

                The guy suffering – like I watched Monsignor
                    for 6 weeks before his death is
                    saying "yes"

                Jerry says "yes"

                Fr. Joe says "yes"

                The "yes" of those so one in Him are
                    all around us.

                Fr. Mike says "yes" – thank God –
                    these are self-less ones who teach
                    us about the "yes" we need to
                    learn –

                Come to me Lord and possess my soul –

                Come into my heart and permeate my soul –

                Help me to sit in silence and
                Let you work in my heart.

                I waited on the Lord and He granted my
                    heart's desires –

                In suffering, in death, He is the
                    bridegroom calling us to sit, to
                    stand, to lay, to weep, to be
                    so one with Him –

                Come to me Lord and possess my soul –

                Let me see with eyes unveiled –

                Let me be part of the miracle You
                    are unfolding around me, through
                    me, in me, with me –

                Don't let me miss that one Lord, while
                    I am anxious and out changing
                    an old car battery that needs
                    more than anything I could
                    ever do to it and in my anxiousness
                    miss the call You give.

                    Waiting on the Lord –

                    Answering the call –

                    Living in Him –

                    Seeing through His eyes –

                    Walking in faith –

                    Trusting in the Sacred Heart of Jesus –

                    Being at Our Lady of Clearwater's side –

                Yes it takes surrender –

                Surrender when we want some busy
                    job to not have to wait –

                Surrender when we need to do the
                    job He calls us to and not
                    put it off –

                Surrender – His timing is perfect –
                    Let's get on His program –

Prayer for Union with Jesus

Come to me, Lord, and possess my soul. Come into my heart and permeate my soul. Help me to sit in silence with You and let You work in my heart.

    I am Yours to possess. I am Yours to use. I want to be selfless and only exist in You. Help me to spoon out all that is me and be an empty vessel ready to be filled by You. Help me to die to myself and live only for You. Use me as You will. Let me never draw my attention back to myself. I only want to operate as You do, dwelling within me.

    I am Yours, Lord. I want to have my life in You. I want to do the will of the Father. Give me the strength to put aside the world and let You operate my very being. Help me to act as You desire. Strengthen me against the distractions of the devil to take me from Your work.

    When I worry, I have taken my focus off of You and placed it on myself. Help me not to give in to the promptings of others to change what in my heart You are making very clear to me. I worship You, I adore You and I love You. Come and dwell in me now.

-God's Blue Book, January 17, 1994

                R. Watching people like Fr. Joe, Fr. Mike,
                    Jerry, Rosie, people in our
                    lives that teach us about
                    living IN HIM –

                "Come to me Lord and possess my soul"

                And God the Father says

                    "Surrender to My will and I will
                        grant your heart's requests."

Freedom

March 2, 1994
Received at Cathedral After Communion

Jesus:  I want you to love Me as I love you. If I asked you to lay down your life for Me, you would give this freely of yourself. I need this surrender from you that you put Me above all things--not some things, all things. I am the Lord thy God, thou shalt not have any gods before Me--not your husband, your children, your life, your house. I want your total surrender! I am not asking you to give these things up. I am asking you to love Me more than any of these things, that you are willing to give them up for Me!

    This is freedom. When your love is for Me and Me alone, no one has any control over you. You live for Me and I am Almighty. I love you with the most ardent love and you know all that comes from Me is from Him Who laid down His life for you.

    Do you love Me? Would you lay your life down for Me? If you love, you give of yourself. Do you love each other? Do you give of yourself to one another or do you have relationships that give to you? This is not love. Love gives from the heart. Love is for the good of the other. I gave My life for you that you might live. Follow the Master. I did not die for any of My own gratifications, I died to show you how I loved you! I gave My only life for you. I love you this much!

    I call you to love. Love is action from your heart. Do you love Me this way or do you just do busy work and call it love?

    To learn about love you must come and be with Me. Sit and let Me teach you My ways. I sit with My red garb, covering My white tunic, you at My feet and I teach you ever so sweetly each day. You are My beloved ones. I died for you. I give you this same love today. Love gives to the other. Do you give this kind of love to Me and your brother or do you ask what others and I will give to you?

    You do not know love if you do not come and you are not taught by Me. I am the author of love. I teach the mighty lessons of love. I died out of love for you.

    You cannot love intimately if you hold back. To love Me, you must totally surrender, surrender all you hold on to. People do not love Me because they want to hold back. If you want intimacy with Me, you must be willing to surrender your all to Me.

    Are you willing to do this? This is where the power is. When you give your all, I possess your soul and I am all powerful. I want your all, not little pieces you stingily let go of. I want your all. Then you will have an intimate union with God. Then you will live in His love and be powered by His might. Then you will be free. I will operate you and you will be united to Me as one. What power, God dwelling within your breast and acting from your soul! Become selfless and unattached to anything. I am God and you shall not have any gods before Me!

end of March 2, 1994 

  

I Want Both Feet Off the Ground

January 18, 1994 4:40 a.m.

R. Dear Jesus, I am ready for Your work. I love You. I am sorry I didn't get to Mass because of the snow. I love You, Jesus.

Jesus: You mustn't feel that I am displeased because you stayed home. You need to be with Me at home just as you are in church. Focus on Me and My love for you and keep making Spiritual Communions. I am Jesus. I am present. I talk, you write. I am He Whose bootstraps you are unworthy to tie. I am He Who loves you intently. If you only knew a little of My love, you would be preaching about Me from a high mountain.

You are he that wants one foot on the earth and one foot in the air. One foot will let go, but the other is not willing. I want both of your feet off the floor. That extra security you hold on to, just in case--that is what makes you worldly. I demand you let go entirely. You will then be free in My love. You will soar! As long as you think you are doing any of it yourself you stop yourself from the total freedom of letting go.

So here you are and I am telling you in your heart to do something and you decide to ask someone else, or you procrastinate, or you want proof. I don't give proof! The beauty of total surrender is to have no proof and total trust in Him Who truly loves you! "Well, Lord, I know you are telling me this." Then, do it child! Let go! Feel the freedom of flying. You are totally free. I am running the balloons. You, child, let go. You totally surrendered to Me and at first you were afraid, but here you are flying and it is such freedom! Take in the sights. Be lighted on your way. Do you trust Me like that? If you don't, you are still in control.

The will of The Father I make clear to you. You want that security the world says you should have. The world is not secure. It is built on a sinking ship. It may look secure, but in one instant your ship could sink and if you are counting on yourself, what will you do?

I sail your balloon to heights you never dreamed possible. Let go. I run the balloon. There may be a little wind, but the freedom of sailing, of knowing you will never lose your way because Jesus is holding you up, what power Jesus has over all and He holds you up! If you go out on a limb for Him, He supports the limb. "Scary," you say? "Freedom," I say! When you trust your interior promptings this much, when you know God is this close that you will do whatever He calls you to, despite the world, that is freedom. You are My special messengers. The world is teaching some awfully sick messages. People are getting literally sick. Become selfless, let Me possess you so I can do what I need to through you.

The world wants you to have security, insurance, jobs that they consider safe. "Be sure you have all these things to be sure." Sure of what? That in one minute there can be an earthquake and it all is destroyed? You are not sure! I have all the power. You are so silly to think you are sure of anything in this world.

There is only one thing you can be sure of: I am Jesus, Son of the Living God. Put your trust in Me and then you are sure. You may not receive a reward in this world, but you, for sure, will receive a golden reward in the next.

Let go, My children. Seek after only the things of God. Do not store up earthly treasures that wither and fade. Store up heavenly treasures that never die.

Let go, My children. I am waiting for you to let go with both of your feet. Jump into the arms of Him Who saves you. You let go, I catch you. God is there to hold you up lest you stumble and lose your way.

You walk the road to My love. It does not go down the solid roads the world has built. It is a road suspended in the sky. To know Me is to let go. Get off that road that appears to the world as solid. You know an earthquake can split that road in half. Walk My road with Me. That may mean the road seems to be missing at times. But you do not have your ducks in a row. Minute by minute you follow a road supported by Me. What freedom! To trust in Me, to do My work with support from Me is so free, but so uncertain for your earthly minds.

I tell you in your hearts. The world wouldn't even hear that which becomes to you a command to obedience. I tell you to do such things. The more I possess your soul, the more it becomes Me acting out of you. You know you are doing things you would not have done before.

This is Me. When you beg Me to possess your soul, you let go and I take over. You don't need security here. You only need the inner promptings and the trust in your heart that God has spoken and you follow His command.

How can I minister to this sick world if you choose to keep one foot on what the world calls "solid ground"? I want to possess you. I want to operate from your very being. I want to be in constant communion with you. I want you to hear the pipeline to Me every second you breathe. You will do this when you let go. I need to have full reign to operate from you as I see fit. Believe Me, I will not be doing what you would do.

When you see yourself moving selflessly ahead, doing My work, no questions asked, when you are listening to your information from within instead of from without, then your pipeline is open and working. Your answers are in your heart. You search for your answers in a senseless world, while you cover up the answers in your heart. Let Me possess you. Be selfless, be unattached. Operate as I am telling you in your heart.

"But," you say, "Oh, how do you test it?" That is the world. The more you know Me, you do not even think. It is I Who operate you. You do not even deliberate. I just work through you and you see that what you did was a vital move in My plan. But you did not even deliberate much. You were pushed in that direction and you knew you had to do it.

Child, listen to your heart. I am calling you to quiet union with Me. Silence with Me. Let Me change you and make you open. Say the Prayer for Union with Jesus, then let go and let Me do My work. I need your total submission. Your security is not found in thinking. It is found in your heart, in being so attached to Me that it is I Who live and act from your soul.

I operate you like a little windup doll. You don't worry and fret. You just go. You ask no questions. You are selfless and unattached and what you achieve is the work of the Son of Man.

I am Jesus. I am God. I am He Who wants to possess you and use you. When I do something, I do not make mistakes. Quit trying to do it yourself. Let Me operate you. Let Me do it all. Get both feet off the ground and say, "Lord, Lord, I give you My all. You use me, You run me, You possess me. I am Yours." Die to yourself and all the things of the world. You are he whom I want to possess and use to do My work. If you continue to do it your way, it is your doing a so-so job. Let go and let Me do My work as I want it done!

Don't ask questions. Don't jump back to the ground and say, "Oh, but it got scary out there with nothing under my feet. I just wanted to stand on solid ground." My ground is all that you must walk. You do not have a choice. My life in you is like being suspended in midair. It only feels good when you have decided that you will let go, that you know in your heart that trusting in Me is the only way. What freedom, to sail the sky and never ever look for security!

This is life in Me. You can't go to the world. Life with Me is like this. Life in the world is sick. You can't go there. You don't let go so you are not fully here. So, there is discontent in your heart. One foot on, one foot off. Surrender, My child. Let go with both feet and don't question! I will lift you up and lead you on your way. I need you to do My work in this world. If you become selfless and let Me possess you, you will operate just as I want you to because I will be doing the work.

Don't look for security! Pray constantly. I am as close as your breath. I am He Who powers you. You will not falter for I will catch you on your way. Your only job is to let go and trust. Know I am truly here and you are never abandoned. I love you so. You are doing My work with all your heart and I am powering your heart. Let go. Living in Me is not the security that the world preaches. It is like being in midair and knowing I am by your side and will catch you. If you feel your life is like this, being in midair, you are doing a great job. But it is not you at all. It is I Who sustain you. It is I Who act from you. You are My precious ones. You, I love to My death! Trust Me. I died for you. I am your beautiful Jesus. I am your spouse. I am ever by your side and I love you with a heart on fire for love of you. Surrender. Let go and you will be free in the Lord!

R. Alleluia. And He made them His workers and they acted as He did in them and the world knew His love in mighty proportion through those who chose to serve the Lord. Alleluia. Our hearts are lifted to such heights in Him. His ways are secure!

end of excerpt